Resolutions? No. (tf)

So 2011 is finally in the rear-view mirror. Good riddance. Stevens wants me to be more positive in 2012 and I told him I’d do my best, but since I woke up this morning I’m not feeling much different. In fact, I can’t remember one year rolling over into another that has felt less….new year-ish. I haven’t met anybody who’s got any grand ideas for 2012, or expects 2012 to be enlightening in any kind of special way. The world still seems poised on the brink of….well….something. Nobody is quite sure what but it’s not good. Aside from the comic relief of watching Republicans debate each other, I’m hard pressed to find anything worth looking forward to in a worldly vein. Personally I’m hoping for the best, as usual. But who isn’t? In short, I expected some sort of cosmic smack to the head when the ball dropped. Instead, I felt bad for Dick Clark, then rolled over and fell asleep. I stayed in bed for the next 14 hours. When I finally did move, it was to the couch to gorge on college bowl games. I caught a nasty cold right before Christmas and it too rang in the new year with me. In place of the night-before streamers and beer-cans and ash-trays of years past were used tissues, Nyquil bottles, and the 4 remote controls it takes to operate my ridiculous TV that I’m still paying on. I think all of this means you’ve become boring and old. I’ll bet even Stevens, who was born when Coca-Cola had real cocaine in it, brought in the new year with more panache than I did.

For this I offer no apologies and have no real explanation other than I am boring and old, and this is the way things are going to be from now on, regardless of what the calendar says.

But still, the new year offers a fresh start for some. Gives them the chance to promise themselves that they’ll take on a pile of ridiculous tasks to make themselves better in the year ahead. Which is why the gym is always filled to the brim with newbies in January. By the middle of February the only ones left are the ones who have been there all along. I promised myself I would write a book in 2o11, but I never got past the title page….which is the literary equivalent of driving into the gym parking lot, then backing out and heading to the nearest McDonalds. I did write a play that was not staged and I can’t get anybody to read, which is pretty cool. I also released a CD that I gave away as a free download. Didn’t want to force myself into a higher tax bracket you see…

This year I’ve made no resolutions at all. I’ll continue (and fail sometimes…but still…) to live by the golden rule and to be a good father to my girls. Noble goals in any year. Certainly more reachable than losing 20 pounds or writing the great american novel. Oh….and I’m going to try to not become homeless. Can’t forget that one in this day and age. All of us are a few missed paychecks away from the backseat of the car….assuming the bank doesn’t repossess the car too.

It’s scary out there boys and girls. Folks are frightened….and lots aren’t really sure where the fear is coming from. It’s like something on that high shelf just out of reach. Fear makes us want to blame somebody, and we frequently choose the wrong person or persons. We’re a nation of divisions. We’re a nation of fences. We’re a nation that doesn’t want to make eye-contact with each other anymore. Great politicians in our history (Washington, Lincoln, FDR) worked to break down these barriers….to make everybody feel like when somebody fell, you helped them up. No more. Today, you can’t be elected dog-catcher without exploiting every crack and crevasse…..making folks feel like when somebody goes down, it’s time for the heel in the throat.

I was thinking this the other day. Whenever we lose something important…..we get mad. We search and search and it’s not where we think it should be. Without fail…what do we do next? We start yelling at everybody else. “You’re always moving my stuff! Where did you put it?! etc….” Of course, nobody moved it anywhere. In a day or two we find what we’re looking for just where we left it….but frequently keep the discovery to ourselves so we don’t have to admit that it was our fault to begin with.

A lot of this is our own mess. Putting up a new calendar doesn’t fix anything.

But still, here’s hoping you find what you’re looking for in 2012. And you don’t blame others when it isn’t sitting on the kitchen table. Right where you didn’t leave it.

–Tom Flannery

~ by admin on January 3, 2012.